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#4012363 Mar 01, 2011 at 05:14 PM · Edited over 9 years ago
1292 Posts
While this is so obscure I must say I laughed out loud watching this insane man speak.. enjoy


1.“I have a disease? Bullshit. I cured it with my brain.”
2.“Winning, anyone? Rhymes with winning. Anyone? Yeah, that would be us. Sorry, man, didn’t make the rules. Oops!”
3."I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars."
4."You can’t process me with a normal brain."
5.“If you borrowed my brain for five seconds, you’d be like, ‘Dude! Can’t handle it, unplug this bastard!’ "It fires in a way that’s maybe not from, uh… this terrestrial realm.”
6."I was banging seven-gram rocks, because that’s how I roll. I have one speed, I have one gear: Go."
7."Can't is the cancer of happening."
8.“Wow. What does that mean? I’m bi-WINNING.”
9.“I am battle-tested bayonets, bro.”
10.“I’m so tired of pretending my life isn’t perfect and bitching and just winning every second and I’m not perfect and bitchin’.”
11.“Look what I’m dealing with, man, I’m dealing with fools and trolls.”
12.“It’s just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee, because I don’t have time for these clowns.”
13.“You have the right to kill me, but you do not have the right to judge me. Boom. That’s the whole movie. That’s life.”
14.“I’m sorry man, I got magic and I’ve got poetry in my fingertips, you know, most of the time, and this includes naps."
15."I’m an F-18, bro.”
16.“I’m not Thomas Jefferson. He was a pussy.”
17."I am on a drug, it's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available because if you try it you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body."
18."I'm bi-winning."
19."There’s a new sheriff in town. And he has an army of assassins.”
20."The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards, all of them look like droopy-eyed armless children."
21."The only thing I’m addicted to right now is winning.”
22."I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words -- imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.
23."[CBS] picked a fight with a warlock." WTF HES ONE IN RL???? WOW FAILS!
24."If you’re a part of my family, I will love you violently."
26."I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People who aren’t special. People who don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA."
27."C’mon bro, I won best picture at 20. I wasn’t even trying. I wasn’t even warm."
#4013130 Mar 01, 2011 at 08:03 PM
220 Posts
What is this from?
#4013147 Mar 01, 2011 at 08:06 PM
111 Posts
#4013539 Mar 01, 2011 at 09:44 PM
481 Posts
I need an uncle like him
"At one point there were 15 girls with strawberries up their butts." -- Fred Durst
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#4018685 Mar 02, 2011 at 07:23 PM
34 Posts
Was too busy winning to read that garb
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